It was approximately last April when keepers hit the wall as far as an artist’s block goes.  The past 6 months have been miserable because keepers have been struggling to regain our abilities to do our artwork–largely because the need to be painting or drawing has been with us every day since our artwork shut down.  But keepers have spent much time struggling the get the ability to match the need that time at the easel has escaped us.

When keepers stop doing our artwork, we all know that something is very amiss in our system.  When things are going good with us, many keepers are fighting with each other at the crack of dawn over who will get to be out and working on his/her particular form of art that day.  Knowing that has not happened even once in the last six months tells us that our system has been more than under the weather for a while now.

Today, I (Ellen) am heading back to my easel to finish my painting of Bullwinkle (the horse).  I have no idea how much work I will get done.  Actually, I am hoping very little because I am thinking that maybe Beth will start wanting her time at the drafting table and maybe Maggie or Chen Lei will feel their own desires to do their work as we move along through the day.  I have always hated keepers internal battles over who would do what artwork on a given day.  Now, I would give anything to hear that internal banter and feel that rush which comes when one of us is chosen to either be at the easel or the drafting table for the next eight to ten hours.  I guess keepers truly do not know how much some things mean to us until they are gone from our lives for a period of time.

Our artwork will be very different for us now–simply because these last months have changed keepers drastically. So many hurtful things have happened and so many unpleasant jobs have had to be done.  I think our entire system is much more cynical than we have ever been before. I fear that our hearts have really hardened as the last 6 months have unfolded.  I am really hoping that putting brush to canvas will prove me wrong and I find that keepers have not changed much at all.

I could sit here and blog about this for hours.  I could analyze what has changed among keepers and why it is so different now.  But all I would really be doing is procrastinating and, possibly, talking myself out of my commitment to spend this day at me easel.  So, instead of blogging more on this subject, I am heading off to dig out my paints and brushes so that keepers can begin to shatter this artistic block that has plagued us for six long months now.

Please wish me luck.

peace and blessings,

keepers