**ONE ROSE GIVEN IN LOVE MATTERS MORE THAN ROOMFULS GIVEN OUT OF DUTY**  Joan Walsh Anglund
This morning, keepers went to check our snail mail with dread in our hearts.  Sometimes, we get just plain old tired of pulling bill after bill out of our mail box.  We had no reason to think today would be any different than any other day on this matter.  However, when we reached in and pulled out to pile of circulars and envelopes,  we found a green one addressed to our birth name and with a return address that let us know this piece of mail was sent by keeper’s youngest brother.  Tears came to our eyes as we opened the envelope and found a birthday card inside that this little brother had sent to his big sister.  For a few moments, our tears flowed freely because this simple act of kindness from someone in our family touched keepers hearts very very deeply.

You see, keepers have celebrated 58 birthdays on this earth.  Mostly, this day has always passed without notice. I think the body was ten when keepers realized that no one was the least bit glad that we had ever been born.  In childhood, the excuses to ignore our birthday were numerous.  One year, we were not allowed a birthday because we had gone to the show the week before.  Another year, we were too poor to afford a cake mix.  Another year mama walked out on papa the morning of our birthday.  Each year has its own story of why keepers birthday meant nothing in our family. In our adult years, the story has been much the same.  Of course, our John Michael always makes the effort to give our littles a special day in some way.  But he truly is the only one who even notices when our birthday comes around.  We never receive even a card from our external children.  And I doubt if our other siblins even remember the date of keepers birth.  So birthdays are not a favorite of keepers in any way.  They are always days that hurt totally because they are huge reminders of how little keepers matter.

Still, keepers know our little brother very well.  He is an extremely busy man with a life too full of him taking care of others.  That makes this simple greeting card sent by snail mail even more special to everyone in our system.  It meant that this sibling who lives half way across the country took a moment to look for a card and to sign it and then took the time to mail it.  The funny thing about our little brother (who is in his early fifties now) is that keepers know he took the time and made the effort out of love and not out of duty in any way.  So, this simple little birthday card made its way into keepers hearts where we will treasure the memory of getting it for forever. And the truth is that keepers feel a little better about our upcoming birthday because our little brother cared enough to remember this year.

Keepers do know that a birthday card is a simple little thing that most people take for granted when it comes.  But, to those in our system, this card was the single rose JWA spoke of in her quote above–with one very special difference–this rose came as a card which means it will never wilt or fade away which means keepers can take it out and remember today for the rest of our lives.  It means so much to us because our brother sent it out of love and because of the childhood bonds that he and keepers will always share.  It was a kindness that no keeper will ever forget and it does not matter to us how silly that seems to others.

Keepers never wanted much on our birthdays.  We never did want to have parties like the ones we gave our external children.  Nor did we want an over fifty party like our John Michael had when he reached that milestone.  But, keepers would have given anything if people who should remember our birthday could have taken the time over the years to pause and just simply let us know they remember.  It was a few years ago that keepers knew any remembrance we received would have been out of obligation and without any love attached so it is better that they not remember but it still hurts when this day rolls around for keepers.  It has been a painful yet important lesson for keepers to learn to not even want what comes solely out of obligation.

Keepers want to thank our littlest brother for taking the time to send this card and for signing it with love.  His efforts touched our hearts deeply and changed the face of this particular birthday for all of us.  It means so much to all of us that he love us enough to remember and send this single rose that matters so much more to keepers than roomfuls sent out of duty.

peace and blessings,

keepers