**This blog is dedicated to B–who is on her own quest for truth**

Keepers grew up in a very dishonest world where family members lied to us and made our own perceptions seem like little more than illusions that we had simply dreamed. We grew up in a family where it was never safe to question anything and it was best to accept lies as facts. Then, keepers spent 17 years working with and trusting a therapist who constantly told us that we needed to trust his perceptions because ours were always way off. In those 17 years, keepers never knew what the truth was and lost all sense of any keepers having a good, working mind. Then, keepers add to that the multitude of people in our lives that lie to get what they want simply because it is easier than dealing in truth. And keepers have dealt with both an internet predator and an attacker against KEEPERSKORNER who presented themselves as one thing when the truth was that they were something totally different. Then, there have been the times when keepers knew, full well, that others around us had the truth yet remained completely unwilling to share that with us.

Keepers life experiences have taught us that our system needs to deal in truth at all times. We do know that some truths are excruciatingly painful to handle but, even at that, the truth is easier to cope with than lies or illusions. Keepers know the damage that can be done to our system by someone withholding the truth from us or just plain out and out lying to us. Only by staying within the realm of truth can keepers remain strong and continue to thrive so truth is what keepers go to great lengths to find.

Keepers have always lived a rather reclusive and withdrawn life. This way of life started for us when the body was 4 years old and we were confined within our Nana’s home taking care of her as she passed away. Back then, days or even weeks would pass with keepers locked up in a house with doors closed and shades drawn and not much contact with anyone. We would play on the floor and watch over our Nana. This was a part of life for keepers until this body was 11 years old. What this way of life did was keep keepers out of school a great deal and kept us from learning to socialize much so a reclusive way of life seemed the natural thing for us to develop.

Instead of the abuse of our childhood making keepers less trusting and more wise about the ways of the world, keepers came into adulthood being very naiive and always trying to believe that this is the one time we can trust. With out former therapist, keepers always took him at his word and were always shocked when it turned he was only lying to us or using us. With our internet predator, keepers believed it was a good kind person reaching out to us and we were very thrown to learn how untrue that was. With our attacker, keepers tried desperately to look beyond the attacks and find the daughter we had always loved so dearly. We were very thrown to learn that this person was only using the identity of our daughter to bring greater harm to our system of alters.

Over the years, keepers have learned that knowing the truth is our responsibility. There is not one person on this earth who has consistently given keepers truth so we have learned to set out and seek it on our own. We have discovered that almost anything leaves some kind of trail. There are things like deathbed confessions that people want to keep silent but talk about in lengthy, relaxed conversations. Former teachers have huge pieces of the puzzle that come to light over coffee. Former pediatricians have even more pieces that come to light when the time is right. When reporting someone to DCFS, one may discover that there is already a long list of complaints that have been filed over the years. When filing a complaint with the licensing bureau–one may discover that the authorities may have been working on taking away this particular license for a long time. Each one of these steps adds to the trail that has been left and helps keepers put together the real truth of situations.

Keepers are very naiive about what is said to us. We tend to take it to heart and believe that it is based on truth. However, so many times we have discovered that our trust was being badly betrayed. That is why we have learned to take the written word to people who have more knowledge about interpreting what is there on paper. For example, what one person presented to us as misspellings stemming from dyslexia turned out to be something very different and very harmful. Another person came at keepers saying, initially, how proud this person was of keepers only to turn innuendos and statements that made no sense to anyone in our system. Through our eyes, keepers were left feeling frightened and confused. Through the eyes of experts interpreting that same words, keepers came to understand the truth of what was happening.

For keepers, trust is an extremely difficult thing to maintain. When someone comes to us0–giving us only part of the truth and telling us that we do not need to know the rest–keepers go on high alert for our being controlled and manipulated. When someone admits he or she has the truth but will not reveal it to us simply because the time is not convenient for him or her–keepers move into the mode of knowing what is best for our system is very low priority for that person. When anyone is talking to keepers about the truth and says TRUST ME, keepers know the chances are we are being had in some way.

For keepers, it is only harmful for us to try and deal with lies or illusions. Doing that brings back feelings from our childhood. Realizing that we are being lied to or put off only destroys our trust. These things destroy keepers sense of safety and of being able to function appropriately in this life. We see it as a cruel act to keep the truth from keepers if it is known by anyone we trust.

Because of our background, keepers have a huge need to deal only in truth. Often, our reality is that we have to go to great lengths and take huge risks to find out what the truth is. We have come to the decision that it is always keepers responsibility to gather the pieces of truth and then put them together like a puzzle with interlocking pieces. To date, keepers have always been glad that we went to the great lengths and took the risks needed to find the truth.

For keepers, having the truth is of the utmost importance.  Giving keepers the truth when others discover it shows trust in our system.  Taking the time to help our various alters process the truth shows caring about keepers as people.  But giving us the the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth is what keepers need and want from those who know us.

peace and blessings,

keepers